How to be a good friend

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We all need a Good friend in our lives. Sometimes friendship is considered as the most pure, honest relationship; in which there are no boundaries or secrets. A friend is someone with whom you can share your deepest thoughts and your darkest secrets. There are some friends to whom you can run to; you’d rather be with them than the rest of the world because after all there isn’t anyone else you would trust. Right?

Su, Debi, Ishika, Mun, Tani, koly, jeba have been best friends since school life. Even outside their busy education life they still manage to find time and get together to share feelings and catch up with each other. Together they call their friendship group “shoptorshi” as in the brightest stars in the constellation. Everyone in shoptorshi knows that it is because of each other that they are still smiling. Even outside their boring, usual clockwork robotic life; they can come to each other to respite.

So what is BFF? Do you really have any BFF? Do you know how to be a good BFF? What makes a Good friend? First thing to be a good friend or in fact a good person is having a good character and loyalty. Being a teenager, I know there are many obstacles on the road to become a trustworthy BFF. There is peer pressure (being pressurised by your friends to do something unwillingly), gangs or grouping, temptations to gossip- I mean the problems are endless. However you know the saying “To have a good friend, you first have to be one.”

Want some friendly advice to be an awesome BFF? Well then, read on…

Tip #1: Get to know your friends

I mean, we all ‘think’ that we know our friends just by spending time with them. “Hey! I’ve been friends with her for more than 3 years, I surely know her better than anyone else”- Yes, of course you might know that she has a huge crush on Robert Pattinson or Joe Jonas (ahem! Not showing any personal affection) or her favourite band is “JLS” (seriously! If you haven’t heard any of their music yet, I suggest you listen to them NOW :P), but do you really know what makes her angry? Or that she has a fear for spiders? Problems in her families that she doesn’t like to discuss etc. I mean, knowing and understanding your friends deeply will really help you become a better friend to them as you will avoid doing something that he/she might dislike.

Tip #2: “Believe half of what you read and none of what you hear!”

Always remember, a real friend doesn’t believe in rumors, half-truths or prejudicial judgments about people that they most care about. If you hear a person saying that one of your closest friends has said that he is a better footballer than you, WALK AWAY; turn your back against it. Get the facts right first, talk to your friend if there are any doubts but do not come to a conclusion based on what you’ve heard from your friend’s friend’s brother’s friend.

Tip #3: Is your friend trustworthy?

Knowing who to trust is a very important aspect in having a good friendship. People are all different and always remember, it’s the good and the bad that makes up a person. Rakhi(A Fictional Name) is such a lovely person to talk to, the small talks and the gossips. However that does not necessarily mean that she will be able to keep her lips sealed if you share your secrets with her. Some people give out secrets unintentionally without realizing anything. So its best to get to know your friends first and make a choice on whom to share which secrets with. Most importantly, where do YOU fit in? Are your friend’s secrets safe with you? Because at the end of the day, your friends will be looking to share their secrets with you and they are also looking for someone trustworthy. Just make sure you are the type of person you expect your friends to be.

Tip #4: ‘Nobody’s perfect!”

Similar to previous point, but we all know that everyone is bound to make mistakes. Therefore everyone deserves a second (and maybe third, fourth, etc) chance. Just learn to forgive your friend for their mistakes as you would like them to forgive you for yours! Just know how to say “I am Sorry” and “I forgive you”. True BFFs will always know these phrases. Always remember “Sorry doesn’t always mean you are right, it just means you respect your friendship more than your ego.” Plus, true friends are meant to have some little fights (not suggesting any physical violence! :P) but small disagreements is common. Just identify where you went wrong and try to avoid it in the future.

Tip #5: Always find some time to spend together.

Many people compare relationships to a tree and it is no different in case of friendships. You need to water and nurture the tree on a regular basis in order for it to grow and provide you with bliss. Therefore even in friendships, just make sure that you are finding some time in your busy schedule to spend with your friends. Even if it is with little things like a little text! We all know that in our modern times, communication is the easiest and cheapest media. Therefore, just spend a little time to talk to your friends. Tell them what you’ve got up to in the past week. Keep up to date with them and remind them that you are still thinking about them. Trust me; everyone appreciates the person who sacrifices their own time for someone else.

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